Newtown Lions Club

November-December 2008 and January 2009

Sat. Nov. 1--Progressuve Dinner

Wed. Nov. 5—Regular Meeting at Stony Hill

Sat. Nov. 15--Sixtieth Anniversary Gala at Three Oaks at Capellaro’s Grove

Wed. Nov. 19--Board of Directors meeting

Wed. Dec. 10--CRIS breakfast

Wed. Dec. 10 Regular Meeting

Sat. Dec. 13--Ringing the Bells for the Salvation Army

Wed. Dec. 17--Board of Directors Meeting

Mon. Jan 12--Lions Blood Drive

Wed. Jan 14--Regular Meeting

Wed. Jan. 21--Board of Directors Meeting

Wed. Jan. 28--Regular Meeting

Thoughts From Your President:

Election time is over. Thanks goodness we don’t have to listen to any more of those annoying phone calls or watch people berate each other, at least for another four years.

I would personally like to encourage each and every one of you to attend the Newtown Lions 60th Anniversary Gala, which will be held on November 15th at Three Oaks at Capellaro’s Grove. This is a milestone in the history of your Lions Club. Our club has been doing great things for sixty years. Be there to hear one of the founding members, Lion Bill Honan, recount the early days of Lionism in Newtown. There will also be a number of other invited guests from District 23A and Lions Clubs from the surrounding area. The committee planning this event has done a great job and we should all have a wonderful time.

A number of important events will be coming up in November and December. The Presidents, Secretaries, Treasurers and Members meeting (PSTM) is going to be held at the Crown Plaza Hotel in Southbury on November 22nd. The annual Connecticut Radio Information Systems (CRIS) breakfast will again be hosted by the Danbury Lions Club at the Amber room, on December 10th. All Lions members are encouraged to attend. The date for Salvation Army bell ringing is set for December 13th at Stop and shop. When those sign-up sheets come around, don’t be shy.

We were recognized at the 100% Breakfast, held at Widdy’s Restaurant at the Yale New Haven Golf course on October 26th. We received 100% awards for our club, our secretary, and both of our treasurers.

The Progressive Dinner was, once again, a huge success. Seven of our Lions Club members opened their homes for cocktails, dinner and dessert for forty-four members and their wives. If you didn’t attend, you missed a wonderful night out. Thanks to Jack Russo and Bruce Landgrebe for a job well done.


Things to Consider

She was only a whiskey maker but he liked her still.

The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.

A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

New Lions in the Pride

Tom Glasrud comes to with a strong business background. Currently he is the business manager for Plastics Muehlstein, a privately held company which trades in plastic raw materials. Based in Norwok, his company buys and sells large quantities of plastics. A graduate of the University of Minnesota, Tom now feels at home in New England. He and his wife, Laurie, have three children, Alec who is a sophomore at Suffolk University in Boston and two girls at Laurelton Hall. Hanna is a senior and Emma a freshman. Active in the Methodist church, he has worked in the financial aspects as well as on stewardship drives. Though he doesn’t have much time to pursue the game, Tom says he really enjoys a round of golf. We welcome Tom and will surely use some of his good financial expertise.

Five Minute Management Course

Lesson One: A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you $800 right now to drop that towel.”

After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a minute, Bob hands her $800 and leaves. The woman wraps up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, “Who was that?” “It was Bob, the next door neighbor,” she replies. “Great,” the husband says, “Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?

Moral of the Story: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.

Lesson Two: A sales rep, an administration clerk and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp in the window of a store they pass. Curious, they go inside and they rub the lamp. As they do it a Genie comes out and says “I’ll give each of you just one wish.” “I want to be first” says the admin clerk. “I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat without a care in the world.” Puff! She’s gone.

“Me next” says the sales rep. “I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of pinya coladas and the love of my life.” Puff! He’s gone.

“O.K., you’re up,” the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, ‘I want those two back in the office after lunch.”

Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.

Lesson Three: A turkey was chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree” sighed the turkey, “but I haven’t got the energy.” “Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients.”

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.

Moral of the story: Bull shit might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there.

Lesson Four: An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing?” The eagle answered: “Sure, why not?”

So the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.


by Lion Bruce Landgrebe

It’s Saturday morning at 3AM, were off to Alaska! This has been a busy year for me at work and when our best friend called and asked us if we would like to join them on a trip to Alaska for his 65th birthday we immediately responded with a big “Yes!” On July 5th we flew out to Vancouver, British Columbia. The next day we boarded the cruise ship at about 2PM. There were four couples, all good friends, traveling on this cruise. .

The second day was spent cruising up the Inside Passage, a relaxing day. There are five restaurants; you could eat from the time you rise in the morning at 6AM till you drop in bed at night 12PM. In the dining room you have formal, informal and casual nights. Before dinner, during dinner and after dinner you have drinks! Believe me, if you’re worried about your waist line I advise you to think twice about a cruise.

There are activities to attend all day, even swimming in an indoor pool. There are shops to spend money on jewelry, clothes, booze, etc. On Tuesday we arrived at Ketchikan. We got up and watched the ship pull into port, then off to go salmon fishing. This was one of the best shore excursions we took. I took my best friend fishing for his 65th birthday. The captain of the fishing boat was a very experienced Alaskan fisherman. We had the time of our lives catching fish one right after the other. There were five of us fishing and we caught thirty-two salmon between us. The weather where we were fishing was cloudy but not rainy, but the poor girls stayed in Ketchikan and it poured all day.

On Wednesday we stayed on ship and went to Yakutat Bay and saw the Hubbard Glacier a river of ice, gravel and broken rock. One of Alaska’s largest glaciers, it extends ninety miles into the St. Elias National Park. Hubbard Glacier is the largest tidewater glacier on the North American continent. It has been thickening and advancing toward the Gulf of Alaska since it was first mapped by the International Boundary Commission in 1895 The glacier’s massive face is five-six miles wide and 400-feet tall. There are 616 officially named glaciers in Alaska, and many more unnamed glaciers. Wahoo! What a sight…

Thursday we landed in Juneau, Alaska’s first American city and now the capital of Alaska. It was founded thirteen years after the purchase of Alaska and it was its gold that captured the American people’s interest. We took a trip out to the Mendenhall Glacier, approximately thirteen miles north of Juneau. This glacier was awesome but retreating yearly; where we were standing was covered by the glacier in 1935.

The last day on land in Alaska we spent in Sitka, a small town of only 8000 residents. We visited St. Michael’s Cathedral, a beautiful Russian Orthodox church , ate Reindeer Redhots, and walked the town. A wonderful day! The last day of our cruise was spent on boardenjoying the ship activities. This is a cruise we will never forget!

My Choice of a High School Sport

By George Raveling

When I went to Catholic high school in Philadelphia we just had one coach basketball and football. He took all of us who turned out and had us run through a forest. The ones who ran into the trees were put on the football team.

Doings of the Pride

It was good to hear that Tony Ratzing was out cruising around in our Mustang. After a long absense due to a promotion involving a lot of traveling and the fact that his company has been bought out bringing with it a bit of uncertainty, he hasn’t been as active as he has been in the past. But he hopes to get more involved one day soon. . . .. ..Recently Barbara and Ken Hostetler were at some kind of fair in upstate Connecticut. A woman began looking at Ken and did a double take. “You look like a president” she proclaimed. Wow! We must now expect big things from Lion Hostetler. . . .Our best wishes also go out to Lion Walt Schweikert and his family. His granddaughter, Faith, was born with an incomplete heart vessel and had to almost immediately have a major operation. The little sweetheart survived it well and is now off the respirator and doing well. However, to correct or aid the malfunction, she faces two additional operations. .. . Lion Lee David has a new avocation. You’ve heard of a pit boss? Well, that’s nothing compared to Lee who is dubbed “Pit Dad”. Seems he’s in charge of schleping, loading and unloading all the band instruments for the Newtown High School Marching Band as they move from competition to competition. Our president and his wife, Evelyn and Ed Miklaszewski and his wife Donna recently returned from a sojourn out west. They drove many miles visiting the national parks of Mesa Verde, Zion and Arches and plus spent some time at the end where they did a little gambling and saw Bette Middler. Tail Twister Ed would like to hitch a ride or give a ride to any Lion who would be interested in attending any of the girls U Conn basketball games. . . . Our best wishes go out to Lion Charlie Godfrey in the recent loss of his wife, Judy. His son, Kenny, and daughter, Crissy, have given him lots of support. And we also send condolences to Wayland Johnson on the sudden and unexpected loss of his brother. .

Focus on Our Wives

Danise David, Lion Lee’s wife, is a busy person, Always a good volunteer, through the years she has worked hard for the Middle Gate PTA and for the Newtown’s Economic Development Commission. She also taught computer classes for adults at the high school. Today her volunteer activities are mainly with the Newtown High School Marching Band and the Newtown Color Guard. For twelve years, even when her son, Chris was no longer in the high school and her daughter, Cassandra, not yet in it, she has been the band helper, the person who picks up a lot of pieces, and often a chaperone on the numerous trips the band takes. Denise also has almost a full time job with Gilman Performance Systems. She is the manager of their web page and does administrative support. She and Lee are also active in the Assumption Greek Orthodox Church in Danbury. Denise looks forward to more leisure time next year when Cassandra goes off to college. Then, she laughingly recounts, “I’ll get back to reading which I love.”