Lions Schedule February 2012 to March 2012
Sat. Feb. 4 Midwinter Conference
Sun. Feb. 12 Valentine
Day’s Dinner with wives at Cappellaro’s Grove in
Wed. Feb. 15 Board of Directors Meeting
Wed. Feb. 22 Regular Meeting
Wed . March 14. Regular Meeting
Wed. March 21 Board of Directors Meeting
Wed. March 28 Regular Meeting with children and grandchildren
While we are currently in a quieter time of the year in our Lions’ calendar, please remember that our mission continues to be that of “Volunteerism”. I say this as our activity schedule becomes more and more hectic as we approach the spring. While we have a core group of members that always step up to assist in or implement our various functions, we can do so much more with the participation of all club members. We are ramping up activities for the Duck Race, the Mustang raffle, Lose the Litter/Earth Day and our new endeavor, planting American elm trees. There are opportunities for all members to follow through with their pledge when they joined the club: that of participation. We never have a lack of things to do, and we derive a great deal of fun and satisfaction from participating.
Krueger and myself attended the Lions District 23 Mid-Winter Conference on
Saturday, February 4th at the Farmington Marriot. At this conference we took the opportunity to
present over $10,000 to Lions’ charities that fall into our first priority
budget category for blindness and diabetes.
Once again your
and no play is not what we are about. We
can enjoy each other’s company at our Valentine’s Dinner dance on February 12th. On Monday March 19th we will get
together for what has become our annual dinner at Lion Gary Frey’s restaurant,
Thanks to all for your continued efforts.
Married for Sixty Years
An elderly Italian man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite Italian anisette sprinkle cookies wafting up the stairs. He gathered his remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed. Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort,
gripping the railing with both hands, he crawled downstairs. With labored
breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen. Were it
not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for
there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were literally
hundreds of his favorite anisette sprinkled cookies.
Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted Italian wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man? Mustering one great final
effort, he threw himself towards the table, landing on his knees in a rumpled posture. His parched lips parted, the wondrous taste of the cookie was already in his mouth, seemingly bringing him back to life. The aged and withered hand trembled on its way to a cookie at thedge of the table, when it was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his wife......
"Back off!" his wife said, "They're for the funeral."
Focus on our Wives
Friendly, cheerful Josie Schmidt is the spouse of Lion
Bob. A teacher of twenty-three years,
most of them at
Josie and Bob are
good partners in many ways. They perform
as a duo called Solid Gold Times
Two. Bob has encouraged her to pick up
the flute which she had played in high school and she is enjoying that as well
as singing with him. They have gigs once
or twice a month ranging from house parties to senior centers. Josie loves it when the seniors start tapping their feet, smiling and singing
along. She finds that very
gratifying. An active member of the Town
and Country Garden Club, Josie is an avid
gardener. Another interest is
crocheting. For many years she crocheted
baby items but as there are no more babies in the offering, she is moving in
different directions. Currently she is
crocheting a scarf for Special Olympics.
One final note: Do you think we
go to all those Duck Race meetings just because we love the project or because
Bob is such a good chairman? Guess
again! We go because of Josie’s
The Horny Dragon Slayer
Once upon a time lived a beautiful Queen with large breasts. Nick the Dragon Slayer obsessed over the Queen for this reason. He knew that the penalty for his desire would be death should he try to touch them, but he had to try. One day Nick revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Horatio the Physician, the King's chief doctor. Horatio thought about this
and said that he could arrange for Nick to more than satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1000 gold coins to arrange it. Without pause Nick readily agreed to the scheme.
The next day, Horatio made a batch of itching powder and poured a little bit
into the Queen's bra while she bathed. Soon after she dressed, the itching
commenced and grew intense. Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers
to address this incident, Horatio informed the King and Queen that only a special
saliva, if applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch, and that tests had
shown that only the saliva of Nick would work as the antidote to cure the itch.
The King, eager to help his Queen, quickly summoned Nick to their chambers.
Horatio then slipped Nick the antidote for the itching powder, which he put into
his mouth, and for the next four hours, Nick worked passionately on the Queen's
large and magnificent breasts. The Queen's itching was eventually relieved, and
Nick left satisfied and hailed as a hero.
Upon returning to his chamber, Nick found Horatio demanding his payment of 1,000 gold coins. With his obsession now satisfied, Nick could have cared less and, knowing that Horatio could never report this matter to the King, with a laugh told him to get lost.
day, Horatio slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder into the King's
underwear. The King immediately summoned Nick.
Doings of the Pride
Hats off to Lion Steve Bennett! For years he has spent a number of hours
ringing Salvation Army bells for both the Lions Club and the Newtown
Congregational Church. Because of his
good work, he was asked to co-chair the event.
From all accounts afterward, he did an excellent job. . . . Dick
Kovacs is recovering nicely from two serious December operations. It was found that he had cancer in his lung
and his doctor was ready to operate but then because of a pre-op exam they
found that his gall bladder was full of stones so that had to be removed
first. I bet Lion Dick will never want
to see a hospital again. He and Lions Stakel and Christiansen and their wives recently spent an
interesting afternoon at the air museum at Bradley. They marveled at the size of the B29 and
enjoyed all the other planes, as well. . . . Lion Christiansen also reminds us
of the good Leo project of selling daffodils.
The flowers are available in either plant or cut form. If interested, call Jon. . . . We have a
world of travelers this winter. Spending
anywhere from two weeks to four months in Florida are Lions Arneth,
Bruno, Christiansen, Evagash, Hostetler, Landgrebe,
Larin, and Mounts.
We hope our snow birds will have
lots of sun and good golfing. And
traveling somewhere in the wilds of
The Lions’ Widow from
Vera, a widow of a Lion from
“I got a new stick deodorant today. The instructions said: “Remove cap and
push up bottom.”
I can barely
walk, but whenever I fart the room smells lovely!”
The Big Burn by Timothy Egan, a winner of the National Book Award
Book Review by Lion Bill Denlinger
In 1899, Gifford Pinchot, a 38 year
old single, wealthy, athletic, outdoor enthusiast visited Theodore Roosevelt, with whom he had a previous
acquaintance, at the governor's mansion in
Soon Governor Roosevelt became Vice President Roosevelt and then, with the assignation of President McKinley, President, and in 1904 was elected President in his own right. Pinchot became chief forester, a presidential advisor, and eventually the head of a fledgling forest service. This book covers the tremendous political battles against the robber barons who would use the vast untouched forests of the nation for their own benefit. President Roosevelt succeeded in putting millions of wilderness acres under government control to save for future generations, but could not get adequate financing to protect the forests.
In 1910 the largest forest fire in the history of the
The "big burn" enabled Roosevelt, Pinchot and many like minded people to succeed in funding the purchase of additional forest lands, mainly in the East, and the hiring and training of a forest service to protect our national heritage.
This book was well written and educational. I enjoyed it.